I have been delivering a number of free coaching sessions recently to help people start 2010 off on the right foot. One of the themes that seem to be emerging is people's fear or reluctance to put in place boundaries, and say "No" in order to protect those boundaries. I will write about how to say "No" without fear of unleashing world war 3, in my next "Leading Questions" newsletter. Meanwhile, I am really interested to know how you avoid saying No. Here are some recent examples:
- Saying "I can't" when I mean "I won't"
- Bringing in all kinds of reasons/excuses why I can't or its not possible
- Talking about something else in order to deflect
- Making vague promises using "maybe" "perhaps" "sometime soon" etc.
- Saying "Yes" and hoping they'll foget
- Using "they" "the management" "the group" or "someone" when I mean "I"
- Avoiding the person making the request.
- How do you go about not saying "No"?
- What kinds of situations lead you to behave like this?
- What is the fear that is holding you back?
- What is the potential impact on you and on others of not saying "No"?
